As humans, when we were young, we were usually happy, vibrant, and trusting. We used to be so happy without a care in the world. We used to be so willing to extend a heart of forgiveness to anyone and everyone. But what happened to us as we got older?
Perhaps growing up, you had several people who lied about you and slandered you behind your back. Maybe you were bullied in your teens and the verbal, mental, and emotional damage never healed. Maybe you even dealt with abuse at home, and you felt like life was falling apart before you even got a fair start.
For the person who rejects Jesus, suffering must be escaped at all costs, no matter how minor. But, for the person who believes, we are given a hope so powerful that countless martyrs were tortured, beaten, or even burned alive yet still embraced the pain and chose Christ over a life of ease and comfort.
As they were suffering martyrdom, many saints like Stephen called out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” – Acts 7:60
It is a heart of forgiveness like this that God is pleased with. Through forgiving others as Christians, we ourselves are forgiven of our sins.
We cannot hold unforgiveness in our heart as well as the grace of God.
God even taught on fostering a heart of forgiveness in the scripture,
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times? “Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” – Matthew 18:21-22
Through quickly forgiving those who have wronged you one is more able to have a heart like Christ’s.
Giving grace and forgiveness where it is not deserved is the essence of what it means to give grace.
The same goes for giving a heart of forgiveness to those who have done unspeakable evil against you and maybe they didn’t even ask for forgiveness either.
As Christians you should readily extend grace and forgiveness to those who don’t deserve it. After all, God gave you grace and mercy even though you were a sinner (Romans 5:8).
How do you Forgive with All Your Heart
All this speech is all fine and dandy, but how do I actually apply it?
The key to fostering a heart of forgiveness is to be as close to God as you possibly can be. Because God is Light and in him is no darkness at all (1 John 1:5).
It is through time with Christ you will be transformed into his image and likeness. By seeking God diligently in prayer and asking him to forgive not only your sins but others sin as well. Through this you are fulfilling the role of a priest in the kingdom of God.
Another key way to foster a heart of forgiveness is to practice thankfulness.
If you truly believed God was sovereign and in control of both the bad and the good, you would thank him for the bad in your life as well.
It is promised in scripture that God will work all things for good to those who love God (Romans 8:28).
So why would you not thank God for the bad as well as the good? Do you not truly believe God is in control?
So, I say to you, readily extend a heart of forgiveness because holding a grudge in your heart hurts you just as bad, if not more than the evildoer.
How to get rid of a grudge?
Something almost never talked about in the Christendom is how to get over a grudge. Getting rid of grudges and unforgiveness is something over the years which I have become very good at.
The simple way to get rid of a grudge is to pray to God to forgive their sins against you. Then, pray for God to forgive your sins against them.
You can repeat this as many times as you need. If that is not working still, the second-best thing I have found is to add to that prayer for God to bless them.
By doing this you are taking the scripture of blessing those who curse you seriously. In doing this you are both loving your enemies and obeying God. An obedient and loving heart is something I have found God honors in times of struggle.
Giving mercy where evil is due is a Godly trait every sincere Christian should hope to foster. The essence of mercy is not giving somebody what they do deserve. But grace, means giving them what they don’t deserve.
This is the heart of forgiveness which God will not despise or reject.
Prayer for Forgiveness of Others Who Hurt You
Dear Heavenly Father,
I pray for you to help me forgive others for the things they did wrong to me. God, I want to forgive them for their wrongs, but I can’t, and I need your grace and mercy to help me extend a heart of forgiveness to those who have hurt me.
Scripture says, “Likewise the spirit also helps in our infirmities…” (Romans 8:26)
So, I ask you oh great and sovereign God, to send your holy spirit, the spirit of truth, and help me overcome the unforgiveness I hold in my heart to those who have wronged me for I am in need of your grace.
I pray as well, oh great King, that you would have mercy on my sins against others as well. God, if I have wronged someone in such a way as I have been wronged, I sincerely repent.
I ask for you to open the door for forgiveness not only of my hurt, but the pain I have caused others as well.
God, I pray that you bless those who have wronged me, for I wish the best for them and ask You to help them in whatever area they need.
I do not know their hearts or their needs, so I ask you God to help and provide for them in whatever way they need.
I pray this in Jesus’ name, Amen.